Monday, February 25, 2013

Rushing the Relationship

As quickly as a click of a mouse is NOT how you should build relationships.

It takes time to get to know people.  Think about how long it has taken you to get to know yourself?  If you are like me, you are still discovering things about yourself everyday!

Rushing a relationship is not good.  If you remember the Friends episode where Ross has announced he is marrying Emily (another rushed relationship that did not end well), Rachel has a conversation with Joshua about how they are 'click-king' and after 6 meetings should get engaged.  Inevitably, Joshua got scared away.  Why?  No trust, no time to get to know what they each had in common, no understanding of what made each other tick.

Rushing a relationship in business is just the same. If you believe that by attending a networking event you are going to meet people and close the sale in that same evening you are rushing the relationship.

I guess, before we dig into relationship I need to clarify for you that a relationship is not a transaction.  A relationship is time invested by parties to come together to develop trust and find out what they have in common that can help them move each other forward.
a transaction begins and ends quickly with no forethought about next steps or repetition.
Think about with whom you are currently doing business -  with whom do you have relationships and with whom is it a matter of transaction alone.

  • how long did it take you to forge those relationships? (yes, that is the phrase, because it is hard work)
  • what was your gut feeling?  why did you feel it was important to create that relationship start?
  • what makes you not move a relationship forward?
Interesting questions to ask yourself as you develop your business and lead others.  Rushing is never the answer (unless you are a football player!)

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